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| In Managua Nicaragua and loving it! | | |
| I have come to the official conclusion that this semester is the hardest one so far for everyone that i know, seniors, juniors, sophomores, everyone.
This week is midterms. everyone is failing exams left and right.
it's pretty brutal.
friday....after 4pm friday.... it is officially midterm break.
i cannot wait. rest and stress relief awaits me.
but it is also saddening because that means i am 1/4 done with my senior year.
I am still debating on how to handle my education...I am considering an extra semester, and i could possibly be forced into this extra semester scenario because i might fail a class.
but who knows, it's too early to tell at this point.
All i know is that the stress level is through the roof. discouragement is left and right. but i truly have great friends for which i am greatly thankful for.
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| this is one of those weeks.
i need 29 hours in a day for this to work out.
and even then, some stuff can't be worked out.
i am a basket this week. i am BLAH.
thank goodness is only monday morning........
ever feel useless, worthless, unwanted, incompetent, a nuisance?
ever just want to shake your fist at the world and swear it down?
ever argue with and yell at God?
I do.
"why the he-- are you doing this? can't you give me just one break in this lifetime?"
"seriously. if you really cared......."
but in the end, He settles me down. I cry out His name. and He holds me. He whispers to me to trust Him.
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| Tuesdays are nice, they are my sleep-in days.
Got up. Talked online for a while. Organized my new music. Went to the Art Studio to get some sketchings done. Field trip to Denison University for a Korean Ceramics lecture and exhibit.
Had a great conversation on the way back. About the future, our plans for our lives, and the plan that God has for us. I feel like I'm on the right track right now. I just feel good when I think about what I want to do.
I know I'm going to be out of my comfort zone by far, but I want it. I've always run from this direction, now it's time for me to obey and listen with my heart and mind.
Now to do some homework.
P.S. Here's a shout out to my favorite Kiwi. Thanks Gary for your always helpful words of wisdom and advice.
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| sad day.
It's the first day of fall... summer is officially over.
and so ive been hardcore thinking about what God has planned for my life... i feel like i dont have my purpose yet. i have one, i just havnt discovered it...
ive always run from missions work. always said no. and i dont know, but it sounds interesting now, even just short term mission trips, since ive never been one. and today in chapel guess who spoke.... a rep for YIM (youth in mission).... too bad i dont have an extra summer left to do it....but it's almost like it was a light slap in the face to make me aware....
who knows, maybe i am being called. ill just have to pray and trust more.
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